Resources

Links to Bereavement Organizations
and Grief Therapists

We highly recommend that you take some time to explore the websites listed below, which offer a wealth of additional grief-related resources, activities, and materials. Our esteemed colleagues at these organizations have put together some excellent content that we believe will be useful and informative for you as you navigate the process of grieving.

Maui County Therapists

Psychology Today Grief Therapists List: Provides information on therapists in Maui County who include grief among the issues they address in their practice.

Nā Keiki O Emalia Disclaimer: The recommendation of grief counselors in Maui is provided for informational purposes only. While we strive to provide accurate and up-to-date information, we cannot guarantee the qualifications, experience, or effectiveness of any particular counselor. By using this recommendation, you agree to hold us harmless from any and all liability arising from your use of the information provided.

Organizations – Local:

Kids Hurt Too Hawaii: Based in Hawaii, Kids Hurt Too Hawaii offers children’s bereavement support on the island of Oahu.

Lili’uokalani Trust: This organization offers bereavement support in Hawaii for children and teens of Hawaiian ancestry.

Let Grace In: This organization provides support to bereaved families through our three core programs: Monthly therapeutic events, Hope Retreats and The Grief Recovery Method educational scholarships

Organizations – National:

National Alliance for Children’s Grief: This organization is a national network of children’s bereavement support organizations. On its website, you will find an extensive resource section with activities, book recommendations, and other helpful information.

The Dougy Center:The Dougy Center is located in Portland, OR, where they are pioneers in the field of children’s bereavement support. Nā Keiki O Emalia has modeled our program on their format, with a number of local adaptations.

Actively Moving Forward: Designed for college-age students, Actively Moving Forward works with young adults across the country.

Helpful Communication Tips

Structure and stability are important for children and teens to have in their daily lives after the of someone important to them.

Answer young children’s questions simply and briefly. As your child gets older, his or her questions will become more complex – at this time, the child can process more information.

Toddlers have a short attention span: your child may ask a heartbreaking question, listen attentively to your short answer, and immediately go on to the next thing that catches his or her attention.

Stomach aches, problems with sleeping or eating, tantrums, and hitting or throwing things could all indicate your child is having difficulty – especially if these behaviors are not normal for him or her.

Talk about the person who died. If such conversation is avoided, children sense they cannot speak about their loved one who died and this silencing can impede the child’s grieving in a normal, healthy manner.

Encourage your child to draw pictures of the person who died, of their feelings, of happy times.

Be honest with your child when telling them about their loved one’s death. How much information you give them depends on their age, but older children and teens want to know the facts. If you don’t tell them, they may imagine worse scenarios than actually occurred. Also, they may hear other people talk–both rumors and fact–and be hurt if they’ve not heard what happened from you.

Older children and teens can write stories or compose poetry about their loved one who is no longer alive.

Let your child know you’re there for them but don’t hover. Give your child or teen space!

Journaling feelings and thoughts is a helpful way of processing one’s grief.

Books on Grieving

The following list of books on grieving for children and teens offers a range of resources that can help young readers navigate the complex emotions and experiences that come with loss. Each of these books offers a unique perspective on the grieving process, and many include helpful tips and strategies for coping with difficult emotions.

There are also books for adults at the end of the list.

CHILDREN AND TEENS

Brown, Laura Krasney. (1998). When Dinosaurs Die: A Guide to Understanding Death. NY: Little, Brown and Company. [Ages 3-8 yrs.]

Buscaglia, Leo. (1982). The Fall of Freddie the Leaf: A Story of Life for All Ages. NJ: SLACK Incorporated. [young and old!]

Cammarata, Doreen. (2019). Someone I Love Died by Suicide: A Story for Child Survivors and Those Who Care About Them. www.limitlesspress.com

Drescher, Joan. (2005). The Moon Balloon: A Journey of Love and Discovery for Children and Families. US: The Moon Balloon Project, Inc.: Building Healing Bridges for Children Through the Arts in Medicine. [Beautifully illustrated and written, and has activities for children to draw/write in in the book.]

Fanning, Tyler, and Macfarlane, Jill. (2017). How the Body Stops Working: Thirteen Kid-Friendly Explanations. CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform. [Demystifies death. Simple explanations for children 6-10 to help them understand why their person died from cancer, dementia, stroke, suicide, heart attack, and other causes. Great help for adults who wonder what to say to children.]

Kaplow, Julie & Pincus, Donna. Samantha Jane’s Missing Smile: A Story About Coping with The Loss of a Parent. [Ages 4-8 yrs.]

Karst, Patricie. (2013). The Invisible String. Camarillo, CA: Devorss & Company.

McVicker, Ellen. (2018). Butterfly Kisses and Wishes on Wings. www.butterflykissesbook.com [Great resource to read to a child who is facing the cancer of a loved one.]

National Alliance for Grieving Children. (2016). When Someone Dies: A Child-Caregiver Activity Book. FL.

Stickney, Doris. (2009). Water Bugs and Dragonflies: Explaining Death to Young Children, A Coloring Book. Pilgrim Press.

Wrenn, Elizabeth. (2001). The Christmas Cactus. NE: Centering Corporation. [A story about a grandmother dying.]

Yeomans, Ellen. (1962). Lost and Found: Remembering a Sister. NE: Centering Corporation.

ADULT READING

Rosenstein, Donald & Yopp, Justin. (2018). The Group: Seven Widowed Fathers Reimagine Life. New York: Oxford University Press.

Schuurman, Donna. (2003). Never the Same: Coming to Terms with the Death of a Parent. New York: St. Martin’s Press. [Practical advice for adults who have had a parent die.]

Smith, Harold Ivan. (2003). Grieving the Death of a Mother. Minneapolis: Augsburg Fortress.

Videos

Our Community Speaks About Grieving Youth

Joe Primo's Ted Talk on Grief

Joe emphasizes that grief should be embraced as a process that can promote hope and resilience. He suggests that the key to achieving a more joyful and fulfilling life lies in forming authentic communities that prioritize values such as connection, trust, support, and dialogue. By creating a supportive environment where people can openly express their feelings and emotions, individuals can navigate the grieving process in a more healthy and productive way, ultimately leading to greater resilience and hope for the future.